zzzzz (who snores like that?)

you could say that i am a night person.

i would probably say i'm a night person.

with that being said i want to be one of those people who wakes up with the sun and is immediately out of bed.

at the moment i'm not.

i procrastinate from sleeping. i know that sounds ridiculous, why would i procrastinate from doing nothing. i thought it sounded ridiculous as well but i just recently stumbled upon an hypothesis that i quite like.

before i tell you what it is, i'll give you a little bit more background. it is almost every night that i will think "i'm tired, i should go to bed" only to stay up for hours more. most of that time is used browsing the net. i'm a big youtube junkie. i also follow a couple of blogs. if not those then it's generally tv shows or movies that i use to pass the time. through these methods i can do nothing productive for hours on end.

i'm not proud of this, even though it may seem that way. i want to be doing productive things with all of my time but instead i waste it. i really wish that i didn't. i'd much prefer to be able to accept that it was time to sleep and follow through with it. i'd get so much more done.

the realisation i came to was that i procrastinate from sleeping, not because i don't want to sleep, but because i want to extend the period between now and tomorrow. of course i can't actually do this but in my reality i can.

it's all about relativity.

i don't remember my dreams all that often and if i do then they usually disappear from my memory fairly quickly. no matter how much i dream or how much of that dream i remember, the time between me going to sleep and my waking up passes without any passage of time from my perspective.

this is why i procrastinate from sleeping. i don't want to have to face tomorrow because it's a job i don't enjoy or study that i can't be bothered doing.

this will change soon. not only will i be finishing exams in a matter of weeks but i will also hopefully be changing my perspective just ever so slightly.

a more positive outlook

more short term goals

all that other stuff that i keep on telling myself will happen.

i'll get there.